Dedicated to the citizens of Mason County, Washington since 1886

THESE TIMES

Random thoughts for a day in October

Becoming aware of the love around you is the only price you must pay to feel joy.

A recent headline on the cover of a health magazine: "One woman's 8-year journey with nasal polyps." I didn't read the story, but I did imagine some of the wonderful places in the world she could take those polyps of hers.

I was at Safeway the other day to get fish, and while I was talking to the fishmonger about something or other, he said, "You can't believe anything reported in the news. They're all bad." I told him I was a newspaperman. "No," I then told him. "They are not all bad. Newspapers aren't bad." The fellow immediately replied, "You're right, newspapers aren't bad, and that's exactly why they're dying."

Does this happen to you? I'll be laboring inside or outside the house when I start thinking what tool I'll need to accomplish the task at hand more efficiently. Then I think, "Oh! My hands will work." It's our first, finest and cheapest tool. And you never have to wonder where you put them.

Excellent bumper stickers: "You left your stove on" and "Don't believe everything you think."

When I walk by homeless people, I sometimes imagine what they looked like as children. Imagination fails me sometimes, so perhaps technology could help homeless people create a digital photo album of their childhood selves that can be seen by passersby through a QR code they can display. You'd scan the code and see them when they were not as they are now. Perhaps that would stimulate empathy.

I'm often immobilized when I see the phrase "Remove card quickly" from a card-scanning machine. I mean, just how quickly is "quickly?" I've tested this by removing my card really, really slowly and you know what? That works too.

I recently overhead a mother say the following to her two youngsters: "What's the No. 1 rule at the market?" The kids wearily replied in unison, "no fighting."

I've come up with a new mental disorder: It's called the Atlas Syndrome, named after the Greek god who's in charge of holding up Earth. The Atlas Syndrome is the delusion that you alone are responsible for holding up the wider world around you – at home and at work. It also helps us understand the anguish that comes when people think they've dropped their world.

Sometimes when I'm next to someone who's busy swiping a finger across a cellphone screen, I'll ask whether there's anything good on the internet today. The answer is always, "No."

I'm not much of a baseball fan, but you should check out a picture of Seattle Mariners pitcher George Kirby. He looks like, and his name sounds like, he just stepped out of the Frank Capra movie, "It's a Wonderful Life."

How responsible are we for other people's happiness?

If you tell someone what you believe to be a fact, but you later learn it's not true, it's on you to let that person know you were wrong. It's a small way we can fight fake news.

I've invented a hand gesture: You extend your middle finger, bring it to your forehead and then extend it as a salute. It's an obscene gesture combined with a gesture of respect. It would be interesting to see how people take it.

Violence is a poor man's job and a rich man's game.

I've figured out how U.S. Sen. Bob Menendez, D-N.J., who's facing three corruption-related charges, can save his job. He needs to join the Republican Party.

Author Bio

Kirk Ericson, Columnist / Proofreader

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Shelton-Mason County Journal & Belfair Herald
email: [email protected]

 

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